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At least Nicola can take comfort from the thought that Malcolm’s decision to dump her overboard wasn’t based on a mere whim or any personal animosity, but was instead the careful product of nothing but the purest and most logical scientific reasoning.

(Poor Nicola)

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060 Michelob commercial (1996)

Well, I think this pretty much speaks for itself and what it says is, A man’s got to eat.  I’m sure this is exactly what Peter pictured himself doing after winning an Oscar. 

This and the Naughty Boy AC Delco commercial from the mid-1980s are the only known examples of commercials Peter physically appears in*, and you have to hand it to them: they are both slightly creepy, but in very different ways.

(Poor Peter. I mean, Michelob?!?  Oh, the horror.)  

(But at least it isn’t Buckfast.)

(or Special Brew.)

*Although when I think about it, even when he’s just doing a voiceover as for his various Anchor adverts in 2013, he still manages to be a wee bit sinister…

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059 The Vicar of Dibley: The Christmas Lunch Incident (1996)

The very best part of The Christmas Lunch is when Geraldine opens the door and the music swells up and the official subtitles say ANGELS SING because YES.

And speaking of subtitles, no, the two different spellings of Peter’s character’s name isn’t a typo.  In Songs of the Praise from 1994 (top two gifs) he was definitely Tristan.  In The Christmas Lunch Incident, he’s turned into Tristram.  I don’t know why, although when you consider that his hair, his fashion sense, and his girlfriend have also changed rather considerably, I guess it’s not too surprising for his name to have also undergone a major transformation. 

(What didn’t change?  His slightly dodgy English accent and Geraldine’s entirely correct response to his very presence.)

Re: the name, since the specific importance of what letters make up a name is actually a thing in Tristram’s five minute cameo — and does get us the adorable scrunchy face Capaldi laugh — maybe it’s some sort of super secret Dibley code?  Or, you know, nobody bothered to check the original episode from two years before and Peter didn’t remember/didn’t really care.

(And also in light of The Sunday Times Magazine extremely ???? about Peter’s height, I’m including the gif of Peter and Dawn French standing next to each other.  She’s isn’t more than 5’0” (1.52 m to the metrically minded) and he’s, well, who knows, but he has to bend waaaaaay down.  I’m just saying.)

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When Ben is the one making logical sense, you know it’s a Sunday morning and no matter how handsome Malcolm may look all sprawled out in his fucking massive vibrating throne normal chair in his crisp white shirt with the unbuttoned collar while wearing his specs, he’s not actually there.  He’s still at home, curled up in bed, dreaming a strange and disturbing dream about a pony that isn’t a horse and a nice lady in a hat that looks like a bat who he would really like to like but can’t because she can’t even fucking walk in a straight line while carrying a giant Frisbee.

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A Pictorial Ode to Rory and His Goddamn Hair

The greatest profusion of Capaldi hair the world has ever seen.  Rory just has too much for it to be contained in a single post.  See it wave, see it bounce, appreciate it from every angle!

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kitt66 replied to your post: 058 The Crow Road (1996) Or as I …

Oh uncle Rory - I both adore The Crow Road and find it terribly depressing. Having said that it’s a bit of a highlight coming in the midst of so many so-so projects for Peter.

Yeah, it’s not one I find myself rewatching too often, but in terms of the production and cast and the source material it is light years ahead of most of the other stuff Peter was getting offered in the post-Oscar period.  Plus he got paid to spend time in his home town, plus he got to work with a bunch of his old mates, which must have been nice. 

So as weird and depressing as the show is, it is an extremely bright spot especially when compared to stuff like Delta Wave or his a-man’s-got-to-eat Michelob commercial that is next but one on the list.  (Which, when I think about it, is as unsettling as The Crow Road, but in a totally different way.)

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058 The Crow Road (1996)

Or as I like to call it, Rory and his goddamn hair.  Be amazed and awed at the volume and curls of Rory McHoan, the rebel writer, who, when he’s not using the world’s oldest computer or riding his moterbike in full leathers, wears a demin shirt (also the pink shirt, but I’m saving that for later) and scruffy jeans, smokes cigarettes (and other giggle-inducing substances), is a good uncle in the flesh and in the spirit, and doesn’t take too much too seriously except for once.  And has that hair!

In terms of the plot of this four part, four hour mini-series, I don’t want to give too much away because on one level it is a fairly basic coming-of-age story about young Prentice becoming  man (or whatever), but on another level it is an ALL CAPS MYSTERY that plays with time and memory and makes me think that if I were a McHoan, I would change my name and keep my head down because they do seem to be a cursed family.  Or maybe it’s just Prentice that needs to be avoided; the boy does seem like awfully bad luck.

But then, what else could really be expected other than tragedy and veering-into-the-realm-of-almost-farcical-doom, since this isn’t just adapted from a proper literary novel with an mystery at the creamy center, it’s adapted from a proper literary novel with a mystery at the creamy center by Iain M. Banks, which means a certain amount of unsettling weirdness is only to be expected.




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057 Neverwhere (1996)

Oh, Islington, you do carry on a bit, but I guess it must be pretty annoying being locked up in a very cold room for tens of thousands of years with only one outfit (sure it glows, but wouldn’t socks be more useful?) and some trick candles and a taunting unopenable door (and some creepazoid contacts that make your pupils huge and black) just because one time one time! you accidentally let Atlantis be destroyed causing the death of millions.

It’s so unfair especially because

So obviously this is the angel Islington who doesn’t get out much but would really like to change that. And, you know, I think he does have a legitimate grievance about his conditions because between the unopenable door and all the open flames, his room is just a health and safety nightmare!

But while he waits for the tribunal to make its decision — which is taking forever — he spends his time dramatically walking, dramatically turning, dramatically standing, dramatically singing Irving Berlin (it’s the little twirl that does it), and dramatically plotting the hideous death of anyone who won’t kneel before Zod ever did him wrong, which, let’s face it, is going to be everyone.   

As to what the whole program(me) is about, I’ll just say Neil Gaiman.  If you know what that means then you’ll know what to expect, and if you don’t, well, I think trying to explain it is beyond my humble capabilities.  The whole thing is six half-hour parts.  Islington isn’t in the first episode, but he’s in the other five and is an important character throughout with hair that, as you can see, is very definitely very firmly attached to his head.

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Yeah, so that’s Islington’s morning sorted, but for the afternoon, he’s already decided: no more Mr Nice Guy Angel.

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056 Delta Wave: The Light Fantastic (1996)

The first of three supernatural-type roles in a row*.  Dinsdale Draco isn’t very nice and he wears way too much lipstick, but on the other hand, white tie and tails, and a little soft shoe shuffle, and I guess if you have to be in daft kids show (because a man’s got to eat), there are worse ones to be trapped in.

The plot of this two-parter can be summed up as something psychic kids something psychic vampires something something top hat something you can tell this predates Harry Potter because in a post-Malfoy world, the name Draco won’t ever be used again in anything aimed at kids.

Dinsdale only shows up in part one in the form of visions and then in person in the last minute, so almost all of his screen time is in the second part.  Unfortunately the picture quality isn’t great, but I’m grateful to have any copy, especially as it was sent to me by a lovely person on Tumblr pretty much out of the blue. 

*The other two being the angel Islington in Neverwhere and Rory and his goddamn hair in The Crow Road.